Oy dear Readers The Retirement Yenta is vlogging! And she is practicing what she preaches, as she has found a great project to wean herself off business – planning her 45th high school reunion. Time to hoot and holler, shake and shimmy and party til the cows come home.
Oy, dear Readers. Your dear Yenta (as you may well know) suffers from anxiety. She does not do well with unstructured time…though she is learning to enjoy it more and more. She’s dealt with some of the unstructured time by creating mini-structures like watching the opening and closing bell on CNBC. But dear Readers, she has found that creating big projects are the best way to calm anxieties and create structure.
This little Yenta is currently planning her 45th high school reunion. She’s doing some of the heavy lifting for the committee and she is loving it. She loves planning a party. She loves managing lists of names and addresses. And you know what, dear Readers? She’s loving reconnecting with her old class mates. She is finding that it is so much better than those “early” reunions (5, 10, 20 years). As RY and her classmates move from the workforce to the retirementforce, she is finding new things in common with old friends. She’s also finding herself feeling pretty darned lucky that she’s survived this long, as about 12% of the class have already “Retired in the Sky.”
This little Yenta wants you to manage your Retirement Anxieties by creating a big project: Plan, Play, and Prevent those anxieties from coming your way.
Retirement Yenta knows the holidays are upon us. The annual office party is around the corner. Getting together with the Girls Going Places group just whizzed by so fast that your dear Yenta saw a blur of blonde hair and pearls. Plus, your dear Yenta knows that a holiday party can pop up at almost any time…and she wants YOU to be prepared.
This little Yenta likes to play with her traditional work attire and add a little bling to the outfit to make it festive. Your Yenta loves a crisp, white blouse with French cuffs. Paired with black pants and a black jacket, it is elegant for work. Add velvet pants or sequin pants and you have a party in your pocket! Skip the socks…pretend you are a Gal from Connecticut! Pair those snazzy pants and sock-less shoes with a touristy NYC tote as a purse with your finest pearls and you have a fun, quirky, elegant outfit that says HOLIDAY PARTY.
RY wants you to know that this little outfit creation is even more fun for those who have retired and have no real use for their work clothes any longer. If you have a suit sitting in the closet that you just can’t quite give up, pair it with some sparkles, add a twist of something fun that you would never wear to the office and get together with your old buddies. Maybe you want to have a Retirement Office Party (in the vein of RY’s Borrow a Boss Tip). Here’s what ya do. Gather your best pals from your working days for a party. Maybe they are a group that all worked at the same firm, or maybe they worked at several of your old work places. You all wear your Holiday Work Wear Ensembles (described above). You name someone the boss. You eat a little too much. Drink a lot too much. Laugh about the old days. Challenge each other to try something new. Give an award or two for “jobs well done.” Congratulate yourselves and then stumble home and be happy you don’t have to go into the office the next day!
RY says: Make that old work outfit snazzy. Sparkle it up for the Holiday. Have a party (or four). Drink a little too much…just don’t fall asleep and snore.
Retirement Yenta’s former boss, Jerry Golden, is blogging about Retirement. RY thinks Jerry has some good advice about anticipating Retirement in two stages. Jerry sees the first stage of retirement as being very active, doing things you didn’t have time for before. In the second stage, he suggests you might be dealing with costs of health care, a home aide, or other expenses that you didn’t anticipate. As you know all too well, dear Readers, RY is a believer in various stages of Retirement. She has her own Retirement Levels approach (10 Levels) to joining the Relaxationforce. Your dear Yenta likes to ease slowly into the Relaxationforce, finding time to practice for Retirement. This is a period where one is still working full-time. She then moves to part-time Relaxationforce/Workforce life balance. RY’s levels are fluid and can move to more or less work as one desires. This Yenta is a FIRM believer that you should be prepared to spend a significant amount of your Retirement Income on Pre-Retirement in the Sky (end of life) Care.
So, dear Readers, RY thinks today is a good day to look at your Retirement Levels. Consider where you are in the Workforce (or Relaxationforce) and consider where you want to be in 10 years, 20 years, and how you will prepare for your Retirement in the Sky. Set your goals now. Don’t wander blindly into the Relaxationforce…you might get hit by an old lady in a Hoveround.
The Jewish holidays are in full swing here at Retirement Yenta’s house and throughout the world. This has inspired your dear Yenta to evaluate her life and her relationships with family and friends. Having lived in New York City most of her life, this Yenta finds it difficult to ask for forgiveness. Forgiveness is something that is not intuitive to New Yorkers. Residents of this City have to push their way through life just to survive. So, when these holidays roll around every year, it is a great practice for RY to take stock, evaluate her relationships, and to encourage herself to consider how she could be a better person (and a better Yenta).
Dear Readers, if you are not Jewish, RY wants to recommend you consider following this long-standing custom of the Jewish people. In evaluating your life, and sincerely asking for forgiveness from friends and family…soul to soul, you can learn about yourself, you will (hopefully) become a better person, and you will feel lighter and renewed. Twelve step programs have recognized this as a way for people in addiction recovery to start their new life. This little Yenta knows that one does not need to be in recovery to have that need to start afresh.
Retirement Yenta wants you to refresh, renew, and recover relationships by asking for forgiveness…holding on to the past, is not such a blast…forgive and let go. It is worth it so!
Retirement Yenta learned long ago (when she was but a wee-little Yenta) that she should stop a project when she stopped learning something new or when the joy of doing the task wore off. That’s right, dear Readers, everything has its time and place. Life is full of change and adventure, and your dear Yenta wants you to know that it is ok to decide it is time to move on to a new task. Humans need change in order to be happy. They need variety. They need to be challenged. There was a period in her life where this Yenta would try as hard as she might to stay at a task or job that simply wasn’t fulfilling (like working in a chicken coop) because that was what she thought she should do, but she learned there are more exciting things around the corner and that she needed to not guilt herself for moving on. This Yenta needed to let go of the chickens and move on to NYC and on to her career in the financial services industry. It challenged her. It made her happy. AND, she was learning things every day. Then the day came. Your Yenta needed a change, but she still loved financial services. So, what did she do? She let go of corporate America and started her own business as a marketing resource for the financial services industry. It has been a great success, and RY continues to feel challenged, refreshed, and rewarded every day.
So, dearest ones, your Yenta wants you to know that everything has its season and everything has its time. She wants you to know that it has a reason and a rhyme. So, allow yourself to let go.
Once upon a time, dear Readers, your dearest, little Yenta suggested you paint all of your residences in the same color schemes (See Tip #349). It worked for her for a time, but as the days and weeks passed, your Yenta began to notice that her NYC bedroom felt a little off. “Why, oh WHY?”, she wondered. Could it be that her perfect coral walls didn’t fit the NYC decor? Yep, that would be the answer, dear Readers. So, RY did a little color change up. She thought and thought about what color would work. She looked around the town and at her favorite design magazines and she decided that a nice pale gray would do the trick. It’s neutral. It’s elegant. It makes the white moldings pop. AND, her stunning white duvet, navy blue coverlet, and sunshine-y yellow pillows simply beam with her beautiful new walls. It’s sleek. It’s modern, yet traditional. It’s, well…, it’s very New York and it feels like home.
Retirement Yenta wants you to consider making a change to each of your homes. Don’t let them all feel like drones. Let the style of your town guide the colors you choose. Your throne will feel at home and you will never lose.
Retirement Yenta is a woman of many moods, and one of many different temperatures. She’s hot, she’s cold, she has a hard time finding a temperature that’s just right. One might call her the Goldilocks of Yentas. This can be problematic for a Yenta when she goes a-callin’ on her friends and neighbors. Their comfy temp may not be this Yenta’s comfy temp. So, dear Readers, RY suggests you prepare for any situation with a light weight, sleeveless cashmere sweater from Eileen Fisher. It’s comfy. It’s soft. It’s warm. Annnnd, it’s cool. It’s something that can easily be layered under or over something, or it can be worn alone.
Retirement Yenta wants you to think about layering for comfort, fashion, and being prepared for any situation. Be a happy Goldilocks and have the clothing items you need to feel just right.
Oy! Readers, Life is like a Mah Jongg game. You always need a 4th and sometimes, you simply need a 5th. So, dear Readers, RY likes to keep her friends around. And while she may be a bit of a loner at times, your dear Yenta likes to be social. She likes to go to the theatre and to dinner with her friends. She likes to have friends over on Shabbos, too! Most of all, dear Readers, this Yenta likes to play a good game of Mah Jongg. Let a Yenta tell you how hard it can be to play with only three players! Since you need four players for a game, someone has to split their personality and play two hands! This Yenta only has a couple of friends with the acting chops to pull that off, but then, you can’t really trust that split personality to not gang up on you and the other two players!
In all seriousness, dear ones, Retirement Yenta knows that some Americans become “elder orphans” later in life. That is to say, they have no kids (or the kids live far away), they have no immediate family nearby (if at all), and they have no spouse (either because they are not married, or their spouse has Retired to the Sky). So, what’s a senior to do? Studies have shown that seniors without a support system have higher rates of mortality and illness than seniors with support systems. Some Retirees are looking into finding new ways of creating a community and a support system. This great US News Article is a great starting point!
RY wants you to manage your relationships. Plan ahead. Don’t end up alone, so you have plenty of partners to play a game or two of Mah Jongg. Just be careful of the grumpy guy in the community who might turn you in for gambling. Like this guy. RY is sure he’s going to end up playing alone.
Leisure, dear Readers, is luxurious. Your dear Yenta loves to luxuriate in her leisure. Now mind you, she is no Leisure Suit Larry. She knows how to live it up and get her work done. She also knows that too much leisure is not good for the soul, and neither is too little. RY has friends living in the land of Retirement that have schedules with activities every minute of every day. It makes this Yenta nervous. She also has friends in the land of Retirement who have no plans. They sit and read, and watch some tv. OY, this makes a Yenta nervous, too. Your Yenta needs balance in her life (maybe its because RY has been doing too much yoga). She needs time off, she needs scheduled activities, and she needs work. Small doses of each give this Yenta the balance she needs. She does not want to suffer from Retirement Burn Out. She wants to relax and chillax without it becoming too much.
Now, RY wants you to know that her recipe for leisure is not the same for other’s recipes for leisure. RY believes that everyone needs to strike the balance that works for themselves. Some need to ramp up their activities, others need to read more. It’s up to you!
Retirement Yenta says: Manage your leisure. Plan your time. If you find yourself anxious, mix it up. Find the balance that works for you, so your brain doesn’t turn to fluff.